I’ve noticed a change in my attitude and outlook lately. It may be due to the lingering feeling of Hawaii on my fingertips and still-there tan lines, however I think it has to do with something else. I realized what the cause is when I suddenly blurted out at dinner to Nate: “I feel more balanced.” He looked at me.

Balance.

I feel it’s a word we throw around a lot. Seek balance, maintain balance, find balance. As an occupational therapist, we even treat balance (both figuratively and literally!). Until I had Waverley though I never really conceptualized what an ill-balanced life looked like. I am, by nature, an “all or nothing” type person, so times of imbalance may not have been as noticeable. Now when I look back at the past year, I cannot fathom how out-of-balance my life was. Becoming a mother was all-consuming and exhausting. The little free time I did possess was spent doing things for others and not myself. I went months without a manicure (the horror!). I feel like I lost my way and lost a bit of myself along the journey.

I didn’t know how to balance life with a baby and life as my former self. Or life in Alaska.

It may be due to Waverley’s very routine nap schedule and penchant for sleeping through the night now, but I am just feeling better about returning to what motivates me and is important to me. I am revisiting goals I set long ago that felt unattainable until recently. I am able to make these goals and my needs more of a priority and not feel guilty in doing so. I never, in a million years, thought I’d be the type of person who would feel guilty about putting my needs first at times, yet that is exactly what happened when I morphed from a full-time working gal to a stay-at-home-mom (now part-time working mom!) and all of the responsibilities and chores that inevitably came with that transition. Why is that! I do not understand Mom Guilt and why it creeps into our psyche the very second the first baby is born. (Go away. There is nothing to be guilty about.)

Every single piece of advice from veteran mommas alway say to take care of yourself and they are 100% right. I just wish I could have seen through the fog sooner to do that. If you’re a relatively new mother like me, then I implore you to heed their advice. Or, if you’re up for even more, here are some tips I’ve been incorporating into my daily life lately to promote a sense of balance:

• Seek adult conversation that has absolutely nothing to do with children.
• Make time for exercise. It’s so much harder with a little person, yet so important to our physical mental, and emotional health.
• Get dressed in real clothes, put on makeup, and do something at least once a week sans children. For me, this is when I go to work and I freaking love it.
• Triage meaningfully. Take care of what is important to you for the day or week. The other tasks will eventually get taken care of when there is time (like my dresser piled high with unworn yet unfolded vacation clothes that need to be hung up).
• Let your baby’s daddy take care of the little one. When I go to class, Nate is with Waverley and it has been the most wonderful experience for everyone. They get one-on-one time together, he gets to experience being at home with her, and I get to leave feeling 100% confident in her care. Oh and I get to come home to a clean house!
• Stay busy. I always thought being a stay-at-home mother would be blissfully relaxing yet when I have no projects and just Waverley to focus on, I feel unproductive and do not have a great sense of self. I feel best now when I have multiple things to focus on, whether it is a Valentine’s Day party or preparing a lecture for class.
• Limit erroneous errands. I hate the feeling that my week is taken over by frequent, irritating errands that are neither fulfilling nor required. I try to order as much as possible online and pick one day per week to run errands. The priorities always get taken care of and the nonessentials don’t, which usually turns out to be a good thing since I rarely escape Target for less than $100 anyway.
• Get out-of-town!
• Wake up early! I don’t mind getting out of bed early when I know it means time for coffee solo, my daily dose of current events via theSkimm, and just enjoying my cereal in peace without chubby hands stealing my Heart to Heart.

These may seem incredibly obvious to most of you, yet they’ve taken me quite a while to truly believe in! One way to seek balance as a parent that we have not been successful in is a weekend away sans Waverley. We are hoping to accomplish this soon! What else do you do to stay balanced in life?