There is something about pregnancy that makes people think they can say anything to you, as if a protruding belly automatically signals the need for unsolicited opinions (often by strangers). Whether it was asking how many times I’d thrown up that day, giving their advice on parenthood, trying to touch my belly, being the 11th person that week to point out a summer pregnancy was imminent (as if I didn’t realize that is what a September due date implied), or comments on my growing derrière, it seemed common courtesy decreased as my abdominal girth increased. At first I was ultra-sensitive to the comments and took them personally. I assumed they were directed towards me given my size … until I began chatting with other pregnant gals. Then I learned that women of all sizes receive unwelcome comments when pregnant. Here are the Top Ten Worst Comments I Heard While Pregnant:
10. You must be due any second! -I’m not, I have 8 weeks left.
9. There’s no way you’re going to make it until your due date.
8. I can tell you’re having a girl. It’s in your hips.
7. Are you sure there’s just one in there?
6. That is going to be one. big. baby.
5. Whoa, your belly is already past your toes with three whole months to go!
4. So, how much weight have you gained?
3. I just lost five pounds and I feel fantastic!
2. Don’t worry, I wasn’t “cute pregnant” either.
1. I predict your baby will weigh between 7.5-8 pounds –The OB. (Twenty hours of labor later and one emergency cesarean yielded a 10.7 pound baby!)
It remains a great mystery to me why people feel they can openly comment on pregnant women’s bodies. Honestly though, the sweet comments definitely outweighed the negative, critical comments yet I seem to vividly remember these. I think the moral of the story is to always err on the side of kindness with pregnant women (um, actually anyone). If you have been or are pregnant, what are some of the worst comments you’ve heard?
hold up. Someone said they weren’t “cute pregnant” either?? What do you even say to something like that? Someone needs a filter. Geeze!
I know! Can you believe that! I think I said that I actually did feel “cute pregnant”. Because I actually did!
One woman at the dentist’s said to me, (upon hearing my due date is December 1), “Wow! You’re really big for not being that far along.” . . . even though I’m where I should be! Someone also told me that my baby should be everyone’s business. I almost fainted at hearing that!
Oh my word! Apparently people just have no idea what a pregnant belly truly looks like. I bet you look gorgeous Sarah!
Great post. The things people say amaze me. My two best so far2. You have how long left? How big of a baby were you? Wow, you are going to have a big baby.
1. (While drinking tea at a work event out of a Starbucks Sao Paulo Brazil mug, from a complete stranger) Brazil huh? Is that where the baby making happened?
You’re kidding, this kills me! I can’t believe the audacity!
That picture of you is AMAZING. So, I heard over and over again, “oh, that just looks painful!” ….this was in regards to my “gosh, you carry SO LOW” belly. Um, thanks.
Thank you! Oh gees, I bet carrying really low was super painful but definitely not something you needed to hear over and over again!
Do you think these people intentionally meant to insult you? I think more often than not, people try to be nice. I think I may have said one or two of those comments to a pregnant women sometime in my life but never meant it as an insult. And I will say, I always want to, but never have touched the belly of a women without being invited to, but somehow the urge is always present when I see a big beautiful mommy belly.
Oh I’m sure 90% of the people did not intend to sound rude. But when you hear the same thing multiple times a day it starts to wear on you! I think a classic “You look beautiful/You’re glowing/You are rocking that bump” are always safe bets:)